Short Takes

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Short Takes (by The Alky Argot)
Burning the candle at both ends is a poor way of making ends meet.
Short Takes (by The Twelve Stepper)
Liquor doesn't drown your troubles--it only irrigates them!
Short Takes (by The Brighter Side)
If you growl all day it's only natural to feel dog-tired at night.
Short Takes (by The Central Bulletin)
Did you ever note how often a narrow mind and a wide mouth go together?
Short Takes (by The Alky Argot)
The bellhop interrupted a noisy party in a hotel room. "I've been sent to ask you to make less noise," the bellhop said. "The gentleman in the next...
Short Takes (by The Paradox)
"Hear about the Cornell grad who died of a broken neck?" "No, what happened?" "He had an alcohol rubdown and tried to lick it off."
Wish I'd Said That (by New York Post)
Gerri Gale: "Alcoholics Anonymous takes a drunk apart and finds out what makes him hic.
Oh, Yes?
"That guy's not an alcoholic--he's suffering from bottle fatigue!"
So True (by Jefferson City Weekly)
"NEVER bear more than one kind of trouble at a time. Some people bear three kinds at once--all they have had--all they now have--and all they expect...
A Tip (by Dubuque Alanews)
FROM a member of the Beverly Hills, Calif., Group comes this tip; 'If you're not as close to God as you'd like to be--remember you are the one that...