Magazine

From the December 2015 magazine.

Desperate on New Year’s Eve

There he sat, all alone feeling sorry for himself ... would he drink? Or would he reach out?

After picking up a nine-month chip, I felt great. I had a sponsor, went to meetings every day and had worked up to the Ninth Step. This is where I stopped.

After unsuccessful attempts to make amends where I begged for forgiveness, I quit. The recurring memory of a friend looking at me and saying, “I forgive you … now bye,” haunted me and made me feel that I was not doing something right. My sponsor at the time did the best he could with his experience, but he had not been taught about saying, “I was wrong. What can I do to right the wrong?” His words, as I heard them were, “It’s all about change.” He did the best he knew how.

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