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No More Angry Nights

Until he got sober, he spent his evenings smoking, drinking and nursing grudges

When I showed up on the door step of A.A, my mind was in a state that could only be described warped. My evenings were spent alone and taken up with hours of smoking, drinking, and nursing grudges from the recent and distant past. Anger and bitterness and self-pity and blaming were my constant companions. I was honing hatred to a fine edge.

For reasons I still don't understand, I was taking some kind of pleasure in this way of thinking. I was using it to justify my drinking as well. After all, I thought, I had been wronged so often by people that my state of mind was their fault and not mine.

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