Magazine

From the March 2019 magazine.

Just like my father

No matter how hard she tried, she became the very thing she said she never would

My father was an alcoholic. I still remember the day when I was 16 and I happened to find a copy of the Big Book on our shelf at home. I flipped the book open. I read, “Once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic,” along with a handwritten note from my stepmother pleading for AA’s help. I slammed the book shut and told myself I’d never be like my father, and back to drinking I went.

I had my first drink at 12 and I loved it. Four of us girls sat in a circle and guzzled a gallon of wine in minutes. It was electric. I loved to drink and drank to live. I’ve heard many women say in meetings that they finally became the woman they always wanted to be. I had no vision for what they meant when they said that because from my first drink I had one obsession: drinking. 

-- Laura M.

Melbourne, Florida

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