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The Reasons for our failure

Don't give up!

I realized several years ago, that human nature has a tendency to follow the leader-by the way sheep, also fall into this category. About the same time as this realization, I stopped holding hands and chanting. My moment of silence at the beginning of most meetings is to quickly remind myself that this meeting is not about me-it's about us, so hopefully if I choose to share, it will be helpful not only to myself but to others.
I believe in the Preamble. I think it pretty much says it all.
As for the drug issue, I'm a recovering alcoholic and drug addict, I'm 55 years old and have remained sober for the past 28 years by practicing the 12 steps of AA.
I don't own AA, don't have any right to tell others how to recover and hope that I never feel the need.
One thing that I do know, is that I am who I am, it works if I work it, and it doesn't if I don't. But please don't hold hands and quote me on that:)


Holding hand seems to promote some emotion bond among us.But the Lord's Prayer is surely Christian,I prefer the Serenity Prayer & it is often used,like last night at my Big Book Study group.

RE: Holding Hands SEEMS...

I believe this is one of the times that Bill W. is talking
about when he says that "Sometimes the temporary seeming
good can be the deadly enemy of the permanent best". Holding
hands with friends is indeed warming. What about the newcomer, nervous, sweating, shaking who is forced into
holding hands with strangers. And I suspect that many non-
believers find holding hands with us Christians repulsive.
Why take the chance of excluding any alcoholic, regardless
of her/his beliefs. Can we of AA sacrifice our need for
the warm fuzzy closing in order to be all inclusive.
Everybody wins and nobody loses. Leave the holding hands
for the romantics. ANONYMOUS

RE: Praying

Our first tradition of unity has nothing to do with our standing around in our "ring around the rosy" circle praying
and chanting. Unity is the sacrifice of our own clamors and
desires for the benefit of those who may be new. I personally do not like to hold hands with strangers. I have
met others who feel the same way. For years I conformed
because I did not have the courage to resist. I no longer
"hold hands and pray" although this custom was accepted
by our conference when they accepted the fourth edition of the big book.
There are probably historians out there who have
information as to when the meetings were first closed with
the Lords prayer. I believe that initally when they
met in homes, they simply ended the meeting after the
last member shared their story. And had more coffee and
I prefer the Lords Prayer for closing the meeting.
The choice should be made by the group's fully informed
group conscience. To announce that we close the meeting
with a certain prayer, and anyone who wishes can join in
is welcome to do so, is acceptable. To coerce any member
to join in holding hands actually harms our public
relations. SAY WHAT?
The "hold hands and pray" closing began in the
northeast in the early 1980's, along with a decade of
other evolutionary changes at the group level. How
well have these changes served us? Our membership
numbers reveal the sad truth. ANONYMOUS If anyone needs
an emotional bond, how about a handshake?

How It Works

Bill W. was our cofounder who led Alcoholics Anonymous through its first three and a half decades. I believe he
made some errors in the last years of his life. Instead of
actually stepping down after the formation of the
conference service structure, Bill remained in charge
too long and remained the head of AA. His reputation
as a womanizer harmed our reputation. I understand that
the membership just refused to let him step down. But I
have studied enough of AA's history, to believe today
that Bill had God given insight. He saw that AA was being
led into being a religion. Bill warned us of the danger of
this in AACA, bottom of page 232. He repeated this
warning in Language of the Heart in an article to the
AA Grapevine in April 1963. We failed to heed these
warnings. Even the courts today have labled AA as
being a religion. AA history is a vital asset, yet
most AAs have never read the information left for us.

Dinner back in the day

I remember stumbling home with a corned beef sandwich and 2 tall beers after a hard night. I guess I figured I wasn't drunk enough. Then, 4 tylenols and 2 tall glasses of water. Maybe a scotch for dessert if I didn't pass out. I also thought this was a perfectly normal way to live.

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