Rule #62: Don't take yourself too damn seriously!

Have a witty caption? Send it to specialprojects@aagrapevine.org

Rule #62: Past cartoons and submissions

1. "Just like a baby, newcomers who are weaned off the bottle need special attention and pampering, too." — Larry M., Coeur d'Alene, ID

2. "Mike's idea of being a sponsor is a bit controlling, don'tcha think?" — Brent G., Springville, CA

3. "Bob's sponsees like to use him as their Higher Power, at least until they find their own." — Scott J., Westerly, RI

4. "Bob really is taking that Twelfth Step a little too far." — Greg L.

5. "It appears he's nearly ready to take his First Step." — Denny C., Atoka Out-of-Towners Group, Atoka, TN

6. "Once upon a time, there was a drunk named Bill." — L.J.S.

7. "Hey, isn't that the guy who wrote "The Big Book for Dummies?" — Joe H., Vancouver BC

8. "George used to be a kindergarten teacher." — Lurdes M., Elk Grove, California

9. "Now that's taking the sponsor-sponsee relationship to the next level." — Veeru S., Mumbai

10. "Some people in the program just refuse to grow up!" — Bill F., Whitby Serenity Group, Whitby, Ontario.

11. "The dummy speaks next. They've switched from 'gottle of geer' to 'gup of coffee.'" — Mike M., Watertown, NY

12. "They used to have a nightclub act but the dummy got sober two years before the ventriloquist did." — Mike M, Watertown, NY

13. "My favorite part is when the sponsee recites the Steps while the sponsor drinks a cup of coffee." — Mike M, Watertown, NY

14. "George says you can be too smart to get A.A., but never too dumb!" — Fred F.

15. "Look, Joe's taking this job as a mall Santa to the extreme, don't you think? — Jay P., New Attitudes Group, Ocala FL

16. "Cut him some slack, Phil! It's his first grand-sponsee." — Michael R., Tustin, California.

17. "Rick is tough on his sponsees. He treats them like children when they first come in." — Scott W.

What's the best caption for the cartoon above? Send your vote to gveditorial@aagrapevine.org

1. Winner:"I wish those guys had the same enthusiasm to do Step 5!"Joe H., Vancouver, BC

2. "Phil's trained his sponsee well!"Dave B., Sherwood Park Group, AB

3. "Look Bill, there they go trying to save another one."Jay P., New Attitudes Group, Ocala, FL

4. "He owns the local donut shop."Anonymous

5. "Isn't that the guy who shared last week about feeling he didn't quite belong?"J.W., Boynton Beach, FL

6. "Hey, last week you told me I was the most important person here!"Doug V., Westland, MI

7. "Oh great, the coffee maker finally got here!"Kevin L., A New Freedom Group, Holyoke, MA

8. "I know the newcomer's important ... but that's just ridiculous."Brent G., Gut Level Group, Springville, CA

9. "Who can sign for a shipment of coffee and doughnuts?" Joey, Oregon, WI

10. "Looks like we'll stay sober for another day, anyway!" - Anonymous

11. "Wow. Everybody does think of me as much as I think of myself." Jason E., Kingsland Recovery Group, Kingsland, GA

12. "We've been expecting you since we opened!" Greg P.

13. "Gee, all they told me was, If you don't want it don't let the door hit you in the a__!" Gerald M.

14. "He'll learn to be on time from now on....we just voted to make him the new GSR." -- Lee F.

15. "Should we tell them he's tonight's speaker?" Dave C., Shawnee Mission, KS

1. "No, sorry, the topic is spiritual transformation."Mike M., Watertown, NY

2. "Will the Steering Committee members please raise your hands?"Carl S., Clark St. 6&8 Group, Clarksville, TN

3. "These midnight meetings are getting weird." Greg M., Decatur, IL

4. "Looks like Lou has a burning desire -- and it always seems to be a full moon."Sherrie R., Vancouver, WAS

5. "No, a little 'hair of the dog' will NOT help you!"

6. "All that moonshine he drank really has affected him."Eric G., CA

7. Winner:"Is this anyone's first AA meeting?"DLW, Bartlett, TN

8. "Yes, we will have decaf next time."Anonymous

9. "A PSYCHIC change, Bob; the book says a psychic change!"JW, FL

10. "He is a real Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde."Scott D., Cumming, GE

11. "Would anyone like a beginner's chip?"Marlo D., Del Valle, TX

1. "Honey, I may be sober a long time but I still can't seem to find my car."Anonymous

2. "Are you sure this is the right place? I'm sure they said there were twelve steps to recovery."David D., Lexington, KY

3. "I can't go in there, Helen! I just saw my hairdresser inside!"Anonymous

4. Winner:"Isn't wearing womens clothing taking anonymity a bit far, Bert?"James, New Zealand

5. "Trust me Edith. I told you I'd help you with these steps too."Brent G., Gut Level Group, Springville, CA

6. "Only six steps? This must be the "half measures" meeting"Johnny B.

7. "No dating for a year, Dorothy...."Greg M., Decatur, IL

1. "Yes, Igor, when you've been drinking, you ARE a monster."Brent G., Gut Level Group, Springville, CA

2. "I don't think you're that unique, Frank. A lot of people get ugly when they drink."Anonymous

3. "Instead of getting Frank in a stein of beers, how about getting Frank to an AA meeting?"Larry

4. "So, you feel like you're the only one, right?"Anonymous

5. "Well Frank, when they are talking about their 'creator,' they mean something a little bit different...."Michael R.

6. "Don't worry Frank, you don't have to bend your knees to take the first step. I couldn't either."S.O.O.C.

7. Winner:"The bad news is, the doctor gave you an alcoholic brain; the good news is, it wasn't hardly ever used."Greg M., Decatur, IL

8. "The rhumba on that police car was ill-advised."Mike M.,Watertown, NY

9. "A screw loose? It's the key to openmindedness!"Fabian S., Bangalore, India

1. "All he keeps saying is, 'I should have called my sponsor.'"Ron J., Yorktown, PA

2. "Is there any room in the jar for another pickle?"Bill C., Phoenix, AZ

3. "Well, at least he came along 'policefully.'"Bill F., Port Whitby Group, ON

4. Winner:"I caught this guy going the wrong way down the 'Road of Happy Destiny.'"Grant H., Serenity Squad Young People's Group, Lexington, KY

5. "He thought 'One Day at a Time' didn't include nights!"Anonymous

6. "I found him stuck on the first step."Dan P.

7. "I picked him up at the hospital. He was drunk and dissed orderlies."Anonymous

8. Every weekend, chug-a-lug. He chugs, I lug."Mike M., Watertown, NY

1. "Is this what they call a low bottom drunk? S.R.B.

2. "So, you think we should head to the meeting now?"Scott W., Westerly, RI

3. "Told you I could drink us both under the table!"Bruce G., Houston, TX

4. "Hey Fred, I have this feeling that alcoholism is always hanging over my head!"Alan M., NY

5. "Shhh, I don't think she will ever catch us down here."Randy G., Prosser, WA

6. Winner:"Think we should order one more before last call?"M.D., Del Valle, TX

7. "We gotta get outta here, they open back up soon!"Scott, RI

1. "Ignore th' bumss, sshhweetie. I thhhink you're beauti ... beat ... pretty."Brent G., Gut Level Group, Springville, CA

2. "I'll bet you were the prettiest girl in detox."Alexander W., Fort Lauderdale, FL

3. "Hi darlin' my name's Cody Pendant and I think we have lotsh in common."Sandy, Wyong, Australia

4. "Those two bartenders over there ... one's Baffling, the other's Powerful; Cunning is on a break."Dan B., Out To Lunch Group, Madison, WI

5. "Can I have my garnish back please?"Bob

6. Winner:"Those guys don't know how special we are."Anonymous

7. "I've got an idea! Let's drive over to my place and get wasted."Anonymous

8. "The cartoonist might have drawn us better if he'd gone to that meeting!"Bruce W.

9. "Finally, someone who enjoys drinking as much as I do! Let's get married!"Bruce G., Houston, TX

1. "Think I'll head back to Omaha, where AA is serious but the fun never stops!"Anonymous

2. Winner:"As his doctor tells him he must stop drinking, Fred has a flashback to an earlier experience.Woody R., Stockton, CA

3. "Wow! I guess they weren't kidding when they said, 'It's not funny anymore."Anonymous

4. "Is it just me, or is my mind playing tricks again?"Anonymous

5. "I thought for sure this was my address."Victor G., Gordon, NE

6. "Standing in front of the next-to-last house on the block, Fred ponders last night's debacle." Loren B., Bozeman, MT

1. "I know we only need two people for a meeting, but I've been sober a year! I'm ready to meet some other recovering alcoholics.Kathleen, West Hartford, CT

2. "Sober all of thirty years and I'm still getting the lectures."Robbyn F., Casper, WY

3. "Honey, I just don't think I can control your drinking any longer!"Bruce G., Houston, TX

4. "So the group called you a bleeding deacon. Would you like me to take you to the hospital or would a bandaid suffice? Woody R., Stockton, CA

5. "You don't have to say your name. I know who you are."Georgia F., Arcaadia, LA

6. Winner:"Honey, you wouldn't happen to know anything about the bottle in the fireplace flue, would you?"Gary L., Chandler, AZ

7. "Say, Mr. Restless, Irritable and Discontented; doesn't your home group meet tonight?Anonymous

8. "And to think I gave up a cardboard box for this!"Anonymous

9. "I thought she was supposed to confine her sharing to five minutes or less!"Jimmy D., Deep River, CT

10. "I'm telling you, as the vote is deadlocked, the Service Manual says we have to go to the hat."James, New Zealand

1. "Good heavens, it's your father!"Anonymous

2. "I told him that he better change his attitude, not his altitude!"David B., Grace Group, Edmonton, Canada

3. "I think Santa had one too many eggnogs."Steve F., Rockland, MA

4. Winner:"Happy, joyous, and stuck up a tree!"Tom

5. "That's why Mummy goes to all of those meetings, darling."James, New Zealand

6. "He always gets lit up about the same time that the tree does!"Howard M.

1. "You're just a barrel of barfs, aren't you?"Sandy H., Wyong, Australia

2. "My husband went out looking for you ...."Alan M., Long Island, NY

3. "A newcomer to AA, Betty forgot to cancel her daily microbrew delivery."Terry D., West Springfield, MA

4. "What? You found him? And he wants a refill?"Brian, Wagga Wagga, Australia

5. "Honey, did you call animal rescue again?Cathy B., Cumming, GA

6. "Ahh, now I know why they call you man's best friend.Lorna

7. "I think it's time you joined "Alcohodogolicks Anonymous."Bill F., Port Whitby Group, Ontario

8. Winner:"I know they say 'rebellion dogs our every step,' but I didn't know they meant my front step!David

9. "I'm sorry, the Barlycorns live next door."Kevin L., Holyoke Noontime

10. "You're just in time for the Ala-Dog Meeting."Chuck M., Freehold, NJ

11. "So you went drinking and lost your key to the dog house againAnnie, Canal Winchester, OH?"

12. "You're a Saint, Bernard! But I'm not drinking anymore!"Tim M., Bradenton, FL

13. "Who called for 'Hair-of-the-Dog' delivery?"Tim K., Sugar Grove, OH

14. "I see booze has you over a barrel again."Anonymous, Bridgeport, CT

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