From the October 1993 magazine.

PO Box 1980

Responses to "Growing Pains

The article "Growing Pains" by Bill S. in the July 1993 Grapevine reminded me how difficult it can be for a man to avoid misunderstandings with a newly sober woman. Bill lost a woman's friendship after hearing her Fifth Step, and then feeling (correctly, I would say) that he should not be home alone with her in the wee hours of the morning.

Perhaps Bill's friend honestly and innocently wanted only his support, and was hurt and angry when he could not give as much as she wanted. It could even be that Bill said or did something that led her to expect that he was more available than he really was. Either way, Bill was right to worry that a "thirteenth step" situation, or the appearance of one, could result. He wisely avoided that, as best he could at the time.

-- B. H.

Ithaca, New York

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