From the December 1982 magazine.

. . . And a Partridge in a Pear Tree

TWO TURTLEDOVES . . . five golden rings . . . nine ladies dancing . . . and a partridge in a pear tree!

Sounds great today, but none of those lovely things would have slowed me down a bit when I was drinking, because my twelve gifts of Christmas (and any other time) were always twelve fifths of booze. What better gift for a dedicated, high-flying drunk?--especially during the holidays.

-- Anonymous

San Antonio, Texas

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