The Power of Amends

From my very first reading of the Steps, I always had great intellectual respect for their power to generate growth and healing. When my discomfort in sobriety became great enough, I started "working" the Steps rather than just "thinking" them, and it was at that point that the Ninth Step really caught my attention. I didn't mind discussing the wreckage of my life in the Fifth Step, but I felt great resistance to actively making amends for what I'd done. As my fear and avoidance mounted, I began to see how the Ninth Step was a serious test of willingness and courage in my commitment to the program of Alcoholics Anonymous. That was also about the time that I noticed the difference between folks who were still "restless, irritable, and discontent" in their sobriety and others who had that deeper sense of serenity that came from doing the work to make the Promises surface in their lives.