From the May 2005 magazine.

Remembering When

A lost cause gets a second chance during the holiday season

Eighteen years ago, the beginning of the end got under way. I didn't know it at the time, but after Thanksgiving 1986 my life would never be quite the same. Recently I have had a hard time not crying when overcome with gratitude for what AA and my Higher Power have transformed me into.

I was nearly a lost cause. My last year of drinking was consumed by five suicide attempts, homelessness, lost friends, family, and relationships. I couldn't hold a job. Drunk or not, I cried myself to sleep almost every night because life had gotten too painful to endure. I was about to turn twenty-eight years old and alcohol had crushed me.

-- Bob K.

Concord, California

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