From the October 2007 magazine.

A Core Of Love

Faith takes amazing shapes

I'm submitting my story because I have heard some controversy surrounding the issue of religion vs. spirituality within the program. I am an agnostic who loves AA. I wasn't always an agnostic. I am a product of a very religious family. My education was provided by private religious institutions.

As a child, I simply believed what I was taught, so of course I believed in God. At about the time of puberty, I started to have doubts. I couldn't live up to the standards required to "live in the state of grace"--mostly in regard to sexual thought and conduct. So, the odds were that I would spend eternity in hell after I died. I couldn't see the logic in a God who would bring us into existence only to have a fair percentage of us end up in hell. I became an atheist before I graduated from high school. I can now say, God bless those who believe and live by their religious beliefs. I could not.

-- Carmen C.

Port St. John, Florida

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