From the February 2011 magazine.

February 2011: Little Miss Mayhem

Life was unraveling faster than she could lower her standards

"I tried to get enough strength to get up and see if I was seriously hurt."

I opened my eyes as I did every morning, trying to focus and check to see where I was on the damage scale. Where was I? Was I still drunk? Was I sick? Did I get sick already? What happened? Oh God, I needed a shower. What day was it? Was I supposed to be at work?—the whole line-up of questions that come from a full-blown alcoholic.

As I tried to get off the floor, I realized that last night was more than a drunken night out. I was lying on a pile of broken bottles, on a blood-and-wine-soaked rug. As I tried to move around I started to see clips in my mind of the night before. It had been my 35th birthday. To celebrate, I got together with a bunch of friends at the local bar where I used to work. When they went home, I stayed out.

-- Tanya S.

Mamaroneck, New York

This is a preview. To view the full article, use the link below to begin a free 7-day trial!