From the April 2011 magazine.

April 2011: At Wit’s End

"He's trying to stay sober, but he's still a lady's man."

Oldies but goodies

Judge: “You’re a menace to other drivers, and pedestrians, too! I’m going to revoke your license.”

Defendant: “Your Honor, you can’t. My living depends on this!”

Judge: “So does theirs!”


Oldies but goodies

“Now that I’m sober, I no longer wake up in the morning, roll over and introduce myself.”


History lesson

Bob: “When I got home drunk last night, my wife went historical.”

Joe: “Don’t you mean...