Adventure into the Unknown

IN MY EIGHT YEARS In AA, I have slowly become aware that the losses and harm due to drinking were, though more obvious, not equal to those from alcoholic thinking. Slowly, against vicious, insidious resistance within me, I began about five years ago to find my way through Eleventh Step meditation. My early attempts, particularly when working alone, forced me to realize how "cunning, baffling, powerful" are the many disguises of Ego and its components: fear, anger, craving. Every kind of justification and demand rose up to clamor relentlessly for "an easier, softer way." I might have thought myself willing to go to any lengths for sobriety, but I was forced to admit that I would not sit still for even a half-hour.