Once Over Lightly

SOMETHING BLUE DEPT.: The saddest story we've ever heard in the Fellowship went like this: "Four of us were having a party. Along about Tuesday, the booze began running out, so the host slipped me a ten-spot to buy more. I did, but then I dropped into a local saloon to use up the change. I was down to half a buck when the thought struck me that Hortense might be lonely. I called her, and she was, but she said, 'Don't you dare come here without a jug!' I had the bottle, so I stumbled over to Fifth Avenue and dropped 35¢ on a downtown bus. It was raining hard as we squished our way south to Greenwich Village, but I didn't care. I was lost in dreams of the fun night ahead. Finally, we reached Eighth Street, and I got out. But, as the bus rumbled off into the night, I realized that the jug was still on the seat. It was a long walk back to 57th Street."