Once Over Lightly

YOU'D THINK he would have called a doctor, like the fellow in this tale. He was a young married man, and had stopped off after work one day for a few quick ones with the boys, arriving home in a somewhat befuddled state. There, he discovered that his wife, who was expecting their first child, seemed to be in premature labor. Rushing to the phone, he anxiously explained to their physician that his wife was in terrible pain.