Once Over Lightly

WE HEARD about two stalwart characters from way back in the Ozarks who were making their first train trip. They were pretty much white-mule-with-branch-water drinkers, and when the train butcher came through selling lemon soda, they didn't know what it was, but bought two bottles anyway. One of them had just taken a swig of it when the train plunged into a tunnel. "Don't touch the stuff, Lem!" he cried to his friend. "I been struck blind!"