Antidote for the Lonelies

I was sober six years when I went to the Seattle International Convention celebrating AA's 55th anniversary. I shared a room at the hotel, where many of the AA sessions were held, with two good friends from Florida, but from the first day I felt different, left out, discontent, lonely. Everywhere I went in downtown Seattle, I saw people wearing AA badges; the streets swarmed with sober alcoholics greeting each other, smiling, happy. Taxi drivers complimented us on our good behavior, compared to other conventioneers. The entire city welcomed us. I went to some unforgettable meetings, among them an old-timers' panel where everyone had at least thirty years of sobriety, a meeting on our primary purpose that was packed to the rafters with laughing, cheering alcoholics, and the gigantic birthday celebration in the Kingdome, where alcoholics carried in the flags of all the countries represented at the convention. I sat there in a crowd of fellow Floridians, not to mention 50,000 fellow sober alcoholics, and I felt alone.