My first drink was at the age of two. I was found in a stumbling state at one of my parents' parties from sipping all the drinks. That started my many years of "becoming a man" with the comment, "What a man he'll be! He's already started to learn how to drink." Well, I didn't sit down to write about my drunkalog, so let's just say that I was a very slow learner and did not find out the real truth until the age of forty-six. That's when I would like to start my story, when my new life began.