Her own part

It was years before I could do an honest Fourth Step. But I guess since I kept trying to get it right, that counted as a desire to be honest. My sponsor would say to me, "This is the same stuff you brought in last year--when are you going to let this go?" The problem wasn't letting it go; the problem was that I couldn't be honest about it. I kept trying to be honest and to find my part in my failed relationships, but I was compelled to blame others and to stay the victim. This went on for years, and it was painful. I had an ego that wanted to be right all the time, and I was miserable.