October 2011

The Thin Ice

Emotional turmoil kept her drinking; serenity and the Steps kept her sober

I remember the first time I heard "the promises," I thought that was the most ridiculous sentimental crap ever. Mostly I was just pissed off that I was in so much pain and that I was sober enough to feel it. I was confused, angry, hurt, scared and totally empty—the concepts of serenity and peace were so far fetched to me. When I heard the Promises read at my first AA meeting, I was certain I'd arrived in the wrong place. I was about one week sober and had just lost my job. I was full of feelings of uselessness, self-pity and economic insecurity. And I most certainly did not see the value of my sobriety. I was hanging on by a thread.

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