My name is Gene and I loved to drink. I consumed large amounts of alcohol with little or no ill effects. The only serious consequence of my drinking was getting thrown out of a prestigious university for atrocious grades. That debacle taught me the secret of the high-functioning alcoholic. People who excel at work can drink as much as they like. Throughout my time in college and into my working years, that attitude served me well. As long as I produced exceptional results, no one really cared about my drinking.