Finding Sobriety Through Quantum Physics

On a Friday night in the middle of my college’s winter term, I sat in the library staring at my backpack. For the previous five months, I had been trying to manage every aspect of pain and pleasure in my life with the hopes of filling the chronic emptiness I had felt since early adolescence. Learning that my boyfriend, also in active addiction, was unfaithful shattered the curved glass that had been distorting my view of our relationship. My efforts to find happiness led me deeper and deeper into a self-centered pit where suicide and self-harm appeared reasonable. Although unaware at the time, I was growing further from my Higher Power with each action rooted in self–self-pity, resentment, fear, and sex. With little thought, I opened my bag and removed a bottle of whiskey. I opened the front pocket and felt for a bottle of pills I had been using to sleep. That night, in the middle of my college library, I tried to commit suicide.