The Prodigal Relapser

“I can’t believe I need a miracle to get sober!” I blurt out in the middle of someone’s share. The meeting becomes quiet and I sob in my seat, the same seat I have sat in for over ten years trying to get sober. Sadly, the same seat I would sit in for the next five years trying my hardest to find the miracle of sobriety I see so many others attain. I am broken, desperate, and exhausted at failing to do as so many have who have sat in this exact chair: get sober. I now know that I truly need a miracle. The kind of miracle that people pray for when a loved one is dying.