Grapevine Memories

I was a bit unable to understand the Big Book for quite awhile when I got sober though not for lack of trying. I agonized over it, looked the words up, and struggled, often crying. There may have been self-pity involved. Whatever the case, I understood the stories in the back of the Big Book, major chunks of them, anyways. I could relate to them. So, when I started outpatient treatment—it took me awhile to become willing to go to meetings—I had nothing to support my recovery aside from Sober Living. I was forever looking for my millions of relapse triggers before a sponsor taught me that "Think, Think, Think" didn't apply to me.