Grapevine Quote

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ax015499
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Joined: 2012-10-03
Complaining is not an action

Isnt that the truth!! Although I have learned that, for me, a small period of bitching time is needed to vent and get ready to accept, or change. Sometimes 10 minutes, sometimes 10 hours, but if I don't acknowledge that I feel it sucks, the action step takes twice as long, and rarely works. Notice it, feel it, then move on: that's my technique for life on life's terms.

Anonymous
10/16/12 OPEN MIND

IT IS HARD TO TO HAVE AN OPEN MIND WITH A CLOSED MIND. THOSE WHO SHARE CONSTANTLY MIGHT CONSIDER LISTENING MORE AND THOSE THAT ARE AFRAID TO SHARE MIGHT CONSIDER BECOMING VULNERABLE BY SHAREING A LITTLE. JSTAR

Anonymous
OPEN MIND /JSTAR

I FIND IT'S A BALANCE. YES HAVE AN OPEN MIND, THOSE WHO SHARE A LOT COULD CONSIDER LISTENING MORE AND THOSE THAT ARE AFRAID TO SHARE COULD CONSIDER LEARNING TO BECOME VULNERABLE BY SHAREING A LITTLE AT A TIME .

Anonymous
Applying the principles of AA to all areas of life

When I first saw the steps, 3 in particular, I thought it a list of Dos and Don'ts. Robbing me of my freedom. Making me 'stupid boring and glum'.In the years since they have been the gateway to my true self. Individuality and freedom have actually increased as I apply these principles in all my affairs.

Anonymous
When I arrived to AA I tried

When I arrived to AA I tried impress to the people. I tried said a very important things and said a very intelligent things. All this made that I did not start my recover for several month. When I talked about my experience with the alcohol, my family, my work, I started my recover.
When I talked with a sponsor about my defects of character, I discover that I had a lots of fears, that I did not know dealing with people. I cost a lot dealing with people, but I don´t injure people now. I have fears but I try don´t be afraid.
When I stated to make service without to impress to anyone I discovered that I can made a good service. When I stated to give a answer without impress anyone I discovered that I can give a answer.

Anonymous
Feed your faith and starve your doubt.

I love this saying, it reminds me that when I focus on the goodness of God, every fear and doubt disappears as a byproduct. So I don't fight my alcoholism, I just focus on God and the drinking problem is removed as a by product. This is why Bills answer to everything is always "more spiritual development". 12x12 page 114 P3. But when we are wiling to place spiritual growth first--then and only then do we have a real chance.

Anonymous
I make mistakes every days

I make mistakes every days and now I can rectify and say "I´m sorry". I try rectify my mistakes when I know that I made it. When I was a drunk I think that I didn´t make a mistake, and when anyone made a error I was never a guilty.
When I drank too the barman was the guilty because he lived for drunks. When I didn´t go to school, the teacher was the guilty because he hated me. I drank because my family misundertood me, I drank becuase people didn´t want stay whith me. I drank to celebrate that I pass the course, and I drank becouse I had had a problem at the work, but I was never the guilty.
when I was three years in AA I made the eightth step I said I´m sorry to same people that I had damaged them. Since this moment I have tried rectify my mistakes when I know that I made it.

Anonymous
I can say nonsense for two

I can say nonsense for two hours, but that does not get the message. when people hear me say things consistent, I see me behave properly and dress looks good, then I'm taking the message.

Anonymous
Grapevine Quote 10-2-2012

The things that Bill writes is the way he keeps things simple.

Anonymous
I only can resolver my

I only can resolver my troubles today. I can´t resolve yesterday´s troubles because yesterday is not here yet. I only can resolve tomorow´s traoble when they came. I should resolve today´s troubles.
For years I and my family remember the yesterday´s problems, sametimes circunstances of several years ago, but we achieved only suffer further, I must learned to forget.
For years I thinking abaut future´s problems but sametimes the problems don´t came, and sametimes the problem was easier than I think, but always I couldn´t make anything before the moment whith the problem came.

Anonymous
When I meet AA I Recived any

When I meet AA I Recived any more important than a word, I recived a hope menssage. I have a solution for my trouble if I want use it. I met people who could practice this solution and had a new life.

Anonymous
GV quote of the day

"I do not agree that the newcomer is the most important member at any meeting ... Equally important are those old-timers who showed me the way, and any middle-timer who may be today suffering. If newcomers are indeed the lifeblood of AA, old- and middle-timers are its skin and backbone."

New York, N.Y., June 1970
From: "Fifth Tradition"
I Am Responsible: The Hand of AA

Here Here!!! I am in agreement with this quote. When I was new, the old-timers said to me, "Take the cotton out of your ears and stick it in your mouth." This is part of my story, and although I was not to happy with hearing that, I got the message to listen. After all, my best thinking got me here.

Anonymous
Newcomer Protocol

I agree that the newcomer should listen & learn. I also agree that the only wrong question is the one unasked!

Anonymous
Hierarchy, Patriarchy.

The newcomer is not the most important person in the room,
and ought not be told such a thing. We all come together
as absolute equals. I have heard that others have been told
to "take the cotton out of your ears and stick it in your
mouth". I am grateful that no one said that to me in the
beginning. Actually I have never heard anyone say that
to another member at a meeting, in over 10,000 meetings.
I believe we can boost the EGO when we tell a newcomer
that they are the most important person in the room. They
are at a critical point where the EGO is deflated, and
the EGO needs to remain deflated.
When I hear someone say "my best thinking got me here",
I consider that a good thing. What better place to be
for an alcoholic.

Anonymous
GV quote of the day. RE: Beginners

In my humble opinion, every day we are all beginners. Sometimes especially at "Beginner Meetings" I feel that the person who may be walking in the door for the first time feels scared, ashamed, worthless, and truly have "the gift of desperation". They may need to speak in order to let us know who they are so we can best make them feel "comfortable". Once they have been around even a few days with a group of caring, nurturing, recovering alcoholics I have personally seen newcomers listen intently.

I enjoy "Beginners Meetings". They give me the Blessed opportunity to identify the people that I need to help immediately. One small action of kindness sometimes can bring a world of hope to someone. From my understandings of all my reading, that is how Bill saw it. God Bless

Anonymous
great insight into the program of AA

(Page 85 paragraph 2 big book). It is easy to let up on the spiritual program of action & rest on our laurels. We are headed for trouble if we do, for alcohol is a subtle foe. We are not cured of alcoholism. What we really have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual condition. Every day is a day when we must carry the vision of GOD's will into all of our activities. " How can I best serve Thee-Thy will (not mine) be done." These are thoughts which must go with us constantly. We can exercise our will power along this line all we wish. It is the proper use of the will. I believe that the only difference between the newcomer & the old timer, is the amount of time in recovery. This tells me that all that I have, is one day at a time. Getting out of it, what GOD's will for me is for me. & How much I remove my self from self & let GOD's will guide my daily activities.

Anonymous
newcommers

we need them all to Pass it On

Lucky Larry

Anonymous
I think everybody are equally

I think everybody are equally important in AA. The newcomers are important because they are the reason why we are here, the middle-timers who are making the services, the old timers who show the way and share their experience in the programme. I always listen that everyone have the same importance in AA, it was a sorprise for me, a few month ago, listen that the newcomer was the most important people in the meeting.
I don´t know who is most important the person who asking for help or the person who pass the menssage of. I am important when pass the menssage but I can only make it if I have got someone to talk to. In Spain the people said that Two people don´t arguing if one don´t want.

robbier
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Joined: 2012-08-16
New, middle, and oldtimers

The reason I think newcomers are the most important is not so much that they remind us middle and oldtimers where we came from and where we could be but also because without them we would have no one to give our recovery away to! We need them as much as they us. It's a we program. Robbie R.

TCTaco
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Joined: 2012-06-12
The Newcomer

Without them I would not be able to stay sober. Thank you newcomers!

Anonymous
still trying to hang on in there.

I'm still learning not to run. When we as ;human beings,don't want to face certain situations. We run and as we start a new begining in our lives. Some of us don't want to deal with life on lifes terms. I'm gonna keep this on I. Being in a facility for 6 months with others can suck at times, but I've learn that us humans have different pesonalities. I can't run everytime things don't go the way I planned. I can't expect people to change their behaviors over night. That it takes time and practise to change our behaviors and our way of thinking. That no matter what happens, I can't run from myself. I' ve learned to stick and stay. That this to shall pass. It's about making the right, positive choises not only for myself but so I can help others in the future. Today I will hang on in their, so I can get better to help others in the present and future.

Anonymous
still trying to hang on in there reply

"I can't expect people to change their behaviors over night".

What you said about "we expect others to change" made me realize that I am so guilty of doing this. I had 2-1/2 years of sobrity and because of a medical issue I ended up back on one of my drugs of choice (alcohol and all drugs are my choice). I have five days sober and a second white chip. I expected everyone to change their ideas and understand "why" I relapsed. The bottom line is that once I had a taste I couldn't stop, nor did I want to. I didn't rely on my Higher Power, I didn't talk with my sponsor, I didn't tell anyone. I simply didn't want to stop.
By only God's grace my drug connection ran out and I was left with only withdrawl and God. Thank you "still trying to hang on in there" for your thoughts. It made an impact on the outside. If I were to get what I really deserved I would be in there with you.
AA Member since 12/10/2009 TGO

robbier
Offline
Joined: 2012-08-16
TO TGO

Thank God none of us really got what we deserved! Keep coming.

Anonymous
What happened to the 600,000 who didn't stay

I remember two people who didn't stay. One killed herself, and the other died alone in a trailer. She left two teenagers, and he left children and grandchildren. They were both wonderful people and our community was deeply saddened each time. This was in the 1980's, and I'm grateful that many of the people I got sober with stayed. We all have 30+ years.
Judith K.

Anonymous
losing two people

They may have had to be sacrificial lambs.some people have to die so others. Can live.its a hideous disease.pray for their souls.god bless y for caring

Anonymous
Judith K. 600,000 or 6,000,000?

I have asked another question for several years now. Why
didn't they stay? I am sure there are some who stop drinking with the help of A.A., and stay stopped after
leaving the fellowship. But I am convinced that their
lives are not as happy as could have been had they
stayed. Many resume drinking, and lead miserable lives,
and die early deaths. Again, why don't they stay? We have the best
coffee in the world, a quality never before tasted,
the nicest friends anyone could ever meet. We are
free to come or go. No rules to follow. We are a
spiritual group but we do not push religion on anyone,
new or old. We only stress spiritual progress as being willing to improve ourselves as far as becoming more Honest,
Pure, Unselfish and trying to be more Loving and
tolerant of others.
We ought to have 8,000,000 members in Alcoholics
Anonymous, at least that many. We have just over two
million members. We grew continuously for over five
decades. In the third and fourth decades we started
to make mistakes, distortions, what Bill W. called
blunders. These Blunders began to effect our effectiveness in helping other alcoholics in the fifth decade. A.A
moves at a slow pace. It took a while for these mistakes
(dogma and distortion) to take hold and damage A.A.
These mistakes have been covered extensively on
the I-SAY FORUM. We have been "spinning our wheels",
churning", for two decades now. We may never reverse
our mistakes. (notice, I said our). I played a role
in the distortion of our fellowship. We changed it
from a fellowship, to a Fellowship, just another
TWELVE STEP PROGRAM, only one of many such programs.
We do not need to "reach out" to find the suffering
alcoholic. They are still approaching us each year
by the hundreds of thousands. We are gaining about
15,000 new members a year, due to the large members
approaching us. We need to "reach" them after they
come to us for help. How do we really reach them?
Again, the answers are on the I-SAY FORUM. You will
have to wade through the nonsense to find the truth,
but I am convinced that it is there. ANONYMOUS

Anonymous
"Humility is not thinking less of yourself, but ..."

"Humility is not thinking less of yourself, but thinking of yourself less."

Daily quote, Sept. 9, 2012

Thinking of myself less, came out of years of service to others. When I began doing service work, it was just that...service work...and when I was finished with a step, or a sponsee for the day, I was relieved and ready to rest. It is not like that anymore. I am of service because that is who I am, it is now all I know. When I start my day, I do not think of how I can be of service, I just am. It is no longer part of me, it is all of me and I am forever grateful to the program of AA for gently guiding me to this place of inner peace and happiness.

Anonymous
humility

todays quote ""Humility is not thinking less of yourself, but thinking of yourself less."
is absolutey correct. Thanks to AA for my sobrity.

Anonymous
A wonderful life

AFter 11.5 years, I have a wonderful life. It has not been through resting on my laurels, thats for sure. Its about contstant vigilant seeking. Seeking daily, hourly, minute, seconds. What I focus on in my life will govern my life. I am what I put in. If i put in God, I get out God, if I put in crap, I get out crap. The work I do on the inside, manifests itself on the ouside. I have been reborn as it says in the 12/12. As I quit acting on the character defects of my old self, and act on the characteristsics of God, I will become more God like, ODAT. Gods the answer what is the question.

Anonymous
Allergy

This was a breakthrough concept. We now know this is not an "allergy" as medical doctors use the term. I am not allergic to alcohol...I respond exactly how everyone would respond with varying differences in quantity consumed. I just can't turn off the drinking and stop at a "normie" level. But this is an example of what I hear at meetings too much...misinformation and dogma. I have shared my ideas about how this is a non-allergy at meetings, and I was met with a cool response, or no response. This program does not attract critical thinkers, or at least I haven't found a meeting that does. So much is said that does not make any sense at all, but we are directed to be respectful--a good thing. Here's what I heard the other day: A woman trying to cut down on sugar prayed to God, asking him if she could have a cookie. God replied that yes, it is OK to have a cookie. So she had a cookie. Or the woman who said God put her (abusive) boyfriend in her life for a reason, and she is doing God's will to put up with the abusive boyfriend. Where are those meetings where AAs have a modicum of common sense???

Anonymous
Critical Thinker??

You write: I respond exactly how everyone would respond with
varying differences in quanity consumed. Then you write: I
just can't turn off the drinking at a "normie" level.
I, as an alcoholic, do not respond to alcohol like
a normal drinker. For me, the first drink starts a
craving, desire for more and more alcohol. Dr Silkworth
called it an allergy. That is good enough for me. When
I introduce alcohol into by body, I get severe,
predictable symptoms. Thus, I ought to stay away from
liquor, peanuts or whatever I find I am allergic to.
ANONYMOUS

Anonymous
allergy refutation

My recent experience with aa agrees closely with yours.
After 22 years, I am strongly considering quiting something that I once held very dear.
Ole Bleedin Heart

jblock15
Offline
Joined: 2011-08-03
""We believe, and so

""We believe, and so suggested a few years ago, that the action of alcohol on these chronic alcoholics is a manifestation of an allegy; that the phenonmenon of craving is limited to this class and never occurs in the average temperate drinker. These allergic types can never use alcohol in any form at all; and once having formed the habit and found they cannot break it, once having lost their self-confidence, their reliance upon things human, their problems pile up on them and become astonishgingly difficult to solve." BB p XXVi Where's the argument?

Anonymous
I am glad for everything...

I am not glad for everything... that has happened in my life! I am not glad for instance that my husband was killed in an accident or that my eldest son is not speaking to me. I am however, grateful for the change and the growth in me that has resulted from those events, and the closeness to my HP that has developed because of them. I am definitely glad I have the Fellowship to see me through!

Anonymous
our dilema is two-fold

Obsession of mind/ allergy of body, seems like its right. But how does this passage shatter my ego? The truth is, if it don't, I will probably die. Death is not a viable solution to this nor is sober insanity. If I don't get teachable, I will have one or the other due to MY wonderful ego. Why did God give us such a thing? Because, mastering our ego is going to be our lifes work. It's what gives us character, integrity, dignity. It's what makes us able to be human. It's what makes us worth while. It's what makes us usable which is, no doubt, Gods intention for us; all of us.

Anonymous
our dilema is two-fold

Obsession of mind/ allergy of body, seems like its right. But how does this passage shatter my ego? The truth is, if it don't, I will probably die. Death is not a viable solution to this nor is sober insanity. If I don't get teachable, I will have one or the other due to MY wonderful ego. Why did God give us such a thing? Because, mastering our ego is going to be our lifes work. It's what gives us character, integrity, dignity. It's what makes us able to be human. It's what makes us worth while. It's what makes us usable which is, no doubt, Gods intention for us; all of us.

Anonymous
daily quote

I haven't done past step 3 yet I think that explains my pain they say pain is optional :) Looking forward to this.Sound like freedom.

Anonymous
Appreciation

The Grapevine quote really helps me to know that I can live my life free of alcohol.

Anonymous
For Aug 27th quote

I agree plus you must accept what you have is enough or you don't get more but once you accept that's enough you get all you need! Robbie R.

Anonymous
On Grace Aug22

Grace was not something I earned or won, nor was it a God giving Right. It is giving and shown by God unconditionaly. It is only by his Grace that I was able to amit I was a drunk and made the stepts to to something about it enough said. Thank you for leting me share.

Anonymous
no longer have to be right

This solved so many problems for me. I was always competing with my brother and it made for a terrible relationship. I usually came up short and got resentful about that, but had to keep competing. I think he enjoyed it too.
I gave it up and just let him be right and be the first or better or whatever. When I really stopped, so did he and we got to form a whole new relationship based on mutual respect and love.

Anonymous
ON BEING RIGHT

I LOVE THE SAYING I HEARD IN AA WHEN I FIRST CAME IN, "DO YOU RATHER BE RIGHT OR HAPPY" YOU CAN'T HAVE THEM BOTH. I HAD TO LEARN OVER AND OVER AGAIN HOW TO LET GO OF AN ISSUE I'M HOLDING TO AND BECOME WILLING TO LOOK AT THE BIGGER PICTURE OF PEACE HARMONY AND LOVE . MEDITATION AND PRAYER HELP WHEN I ASK MY HIGHER POWER TO HELP ME LET GO AND LET GOD AND SEE THE TRUTH IN THE SITUATION. JSTAR.

Anonymous
I know what you mean.. I'm

I know what you mean.. I'm learning how to accept people, places and things the way they r... Like they say, "it is.. What it is.". God knows I don't have to be right anymore.. I just want to be happy, joyous n free..

Anonymous
I know what you mean.. I'm

I know what you mean.. I'm learning how to accept people, places and things the way they r... Like they say, "it is.. What it is.". God knows I don't have to be right anymore.. I just want to be happy, joyous n free..

Anonymous
RE: ON BEING RIGHT

I beg to differ. I am often right. That doesn't
always make me happy. There are many times when I
am right and I wish I were mistaken. But the truth
is always the truth, even if it is tragic. ANONYMOUS

Anonymous
Amends

One dictionary defines amends as "to change" so to a great extent by simply staying sober and changing my behavior I am making a form of amends, especially to those I can't find for one reason or another or to those who have passed away. Also by helping others I can make amends because I may be helping those in their relations avoid the pain I put my relations through.

Solutions
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Joined: 2011-06-07
no new quotes for me

I unsubscribed from the daily quotes because I found them to be useless homilies that that offered little in the way support and nothing in the way of contemplative value.

Anonymous
Quote for August 9th 2012

I try not to use the words I'm sorry in any amends. I am trying to give something back. A remorseful mumbling won't fit the bill. I disagree with this: "ask people to forgive me, this will remove the burden from my shoulders". This implies I'm doing the amends to seek something for myself, i.e. forgiveness and relief from my burden. And this is dependant on whether or not I can manipulate someone to give this to me. Taking from them again. The Big Book states main purpose of the 9th step amends is to be of maximum service to God and the people about me.

Anonymous
quote for August 9, 2012

This is so true for me! It took me awhile to realize this but now I do !!!!!! It's a great feeling ! Pam

Anonymous
Grapevine Quote 8/09/12

Just my own opinion of course .... I don't ask victims of my poor behaviors forgiveness, I simply make amends (Step 10 currently). I've already abused them by doing/saying something inappropriate and to request of them forgiveness just compounds that abuse of expectation to accommodate me further.d I close my discussion with them asking if there is anything I can do to make the situation right, then act accordingly.

Best,

Bob

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