Heard At Meetings

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JamesX
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Joined: 2013-05-13
Okay

Okay

Anonymous
"Don't think, don't drink,

"Don't think, don't drink, and get to a meeting!"

Anonymous
"Don't think. Don't drink and get to a meeting!"

An excellent piece of advice!

Anonymous
?

cant stop need help too weak two days trying for three.
pray for me!!!!!! jonny.

Anonymous
Surrender.

One big problem that I had was that failed all the time to get rid of my inner yearning for the the God of my own understanding!

Anonymous
Try "giving up"

Almost three years ago, I send my first sincere prayer to God. Actually, I prayed to the dome light in the car. I asked for guidance and a sign I was doing what He wanted me to do. That's "God" Him, Her or It. Not of a religion or even what other AA's think God is. Just something greater than me. That's all.

I went into a meeting and met a sponsor there.

No one told me that no matter how bad it SUCKS, it WILL PASS, no matter what you do or don't do, AND that some days ARE going to suck, whether you are sober or not! They will just suck much more if you're high is all.

Know that the reason you use WON'T fix the issue of why you hurt. EVER. One you know that in your heart, atheist or not, you're ready 110% to quit. Because getting high doesn't help.

Call another AA, get or call your sponsor. Know it's OK to hurt, feel sad, cry, be furious, etc. Go for a run; that worked well for me, especially when I'm furious! Eat something. Talk to someone. Volunteer at PAWS or somewhere that speaks to you. "Get OUT of yourself!" As they say. Ask about someone else, and REALLY HEAR the answers.

Go see a movie you have been waiting on. Read a brand-new book. Sniff a fresh puppy! Learn a new language. Work on your typing skills or anything you always wanted to learn.

It's not ABOUT weakness, Jonny, TRUST ME. It's a mental illness, as stated in "The Dr.'s Opinion" at the start of the Big Book of AA.

NEVER, EVER pick up that first drink. LITERALLY! Knock it over if you have to.

It WILL get better, it's just that part of your mind hates you and you don't have much practice doing other things besides using yet. It's been three years, and TRUST ME, the day will come when you wouldn't trade your worst day sober for your best day stoned out of your mind, because you KNOW you always have to pay for it later!

May like Dr. Amen's Change your Brain, Change your life, book about SPECT scans and alcoholism.

Anonymous
can't stop

you already have stopped. we are all weak and need each other. my sponsor
dared me to be a burden,make mistakes and do what i didn't want to do--which was everything. Because i am weak, i am sober 42 years. i need you

Anonymous
RE: can't stop

Try to let go and let God if you can't rely on God find an outside sponsor a parole officer may help you for a while when all else fails come on back and try A.A. next time and if God runs you out sponsors are known to blame God for it too.

Anonymous
jonny

send you my prayers and love. remember we are all weak. we need each other.
to know you are weak will be your strength. i am sober 42 years and it
i still resist going to meetings which saved my life. i pray for willingness to do
what i don't want to do. i have learned to shake hans with my humanity--i
am weak-i am human. i will always be. love you. we are here for you.

Anonymous
Jonny My prayers our with

Jonny
My prayers our with you.

Anonymous
You say, "can't stop need

You say, "can't stop need help too weak two days trying for three." But you did stop for two days ONE DAY AT A TIME. Well done friend, trying for three, you say, that is wonderful

Thanks for very encouraging sharing.

Chipdip
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Joined: 2012-08-11
Turn it over to God

Turn it over to God

AD010416
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Joined: 2012-01-18
Re: "Don't think, don't drink, and get to a meeting!"

Don't think? I have yet to meet a living human being who can actually not think, at least while awake.
Don't drink? How many times have alcoholics been told, "don't drink" by non-alcoholics. If we were able to "don't drink" we wouldn't need AA.
Get to a meeting? Well, at least it will keep you off the streets and out of the bars for an hour or so.

Anonymous
Get to a meeting

AA meetings do "get you off the streets and out of the bars for an hour or so."
Exactly. And that is a huge piece of the wisdom that is AA. A better place to be. A better choice than self destruction.

You become one with the crowd.
You forge common goals.
You are not alone.
You have courage.

And all the time you have been creating these better experiences, you are not drinking.
A equals B equals C.

redsky
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Joined: 2012-01-21
sponsership

should you approach a newcomer to offer your self to be their sponsor or should you always wait for them to ask you

JamesX
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Joined: 2013-05-13
What? You have the solution.

What? You have the solution. Most likely they don't know they have a problem or there in denial about having a problem. You are armed with some facts about yourself. Just ask them can you tell them your story. You.can gain there confindence when know one.else can.

Anonymous
sponsorship

How about "You want to go out for coffee after the meeting? I'm buying".

I think it comes under the heading "If you want what we have and are willing..."

The newcomer can't develop much of a sense of "What we have until he (she)spends some time with us.

My 2 cents.

pcm54
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Joined: 2013-12-02
How true!!

There are only three women in the program where I live. Actually, I have to travel five hours to a meeting in their city. They all have told me not to get lonely. So, I ask each one of them (I am the newcomer) to go for coffee and they are all too busy. They don't have time to meet me at a meeting. When I ask them about it, they just tell me I am too self-centered and lonely....sigh. Thank goodness for forums like this and the male German tourists who are willing to have meetings in my hometown!

Anonymous
Success

Success and failure are always temporary!

Anonymous
SUCCESS.

The only place where SUCCESS comes before WORK is in the DICTIONARY!!!

Anonymous
We share our experience

Have been chairing a “As Bill sees it” meeting for a while. A few times I took someone quietly aside after the meeting and tried to explain the difference in sharing our experience from analysis, advice and other material found on the ground behind male cows. I finally printed out cards with the following information and left one with each book around the table. I can’t duplicate the format here but the word experience is BOLD and the quotes that aren’t experience are strikethrough.

After the meeting I offered one of the worst offenders a copy to take home and he smiled and showed one already in his shirt pocket. I’m sure an intelligent man, a retired air force officer but he just didn’t understand “sharing experience” until it was spelled out. I’ve made hundreds of such mistakes myself. A big part of AA, explaining a few simple ideas in enough ways so we all finally “get it”. If you have chronic advice-givers or over-thinkers in your group feel free to copy this and pass out some bookmarks.

__________________________________________________________
We share our experience –

“What I think…..” Your thinking
“I think what we do……” Your analysis
“I think what people should do…” Your advice
“What I should do…” Your uncommitted speculation
“What they told me…” Who knows?
“What I do is….” Your experience
“What I have done…” Your experience
“When … happens, I feel….” Your experience
“What I read in the Big Book….” Our recorded experience
__________________________________________________________

Anonymous
Reading your mind

I told my counsellor that I could read people's minds. SHE SAID, "YOU ARE SITTING IN A ROOM WITH ANOTHER PERSON. YOU ARE BOTH SILENT. YOU SAY THAT YOU CAN READ THEIR THOUGHTS! I REPLIED, "YES. I CAN." SHE SMILED AND REPLIED, "WHEN YOU ARE IN THIS SITUATION, THE ONLY MIND YOU HAVE ACCESS TO IS YOUR MIND AND YOUR THINKING!!!"

THEN YOU MAKE A NECKLACE OF YOUR OWN THOUGHTS AND MENTALLY HANG IT AROUND THEIR NECK!!! AND SAY THAT THEY ARE THINKING THOSE THOUGHTS!!!"

I THINK THAT THIS WAS A LIGHT BUB MOMENT FOR ME, I REMIND MYSELF OF THAT MANY TIMES EACH 24 HOUR PERIOD. COME TO THINK OF IT, IF WE COULD READ EACH OTHER'S MINDS, WHAT NEED WOULD THERE BE OF HUMAN LANGUAGE?

gunnre
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Joined: 2012-07-22
reading your mind

Awesome.... My wife and I had a nice little discussion of this last night. 31 yrs of marriage we have been 'reading each other's minds' a lot lately. Assuming we know each others thoughts, intentions, reactions. Truly errodes the peace of mind. Thank you. Seeing this over my morning coffee/quiet time must be my topic for prayer and change today :)

Anonymous
The wreckage of...

A sponsor advised me,"FOR GOD SAKE STOP RIGHT NOW THIS VERY MINUTE, TRYING TO CLEAR AWAY THE WRECKAGE OF YOUR FUTURE!!!"

That is still good counsel!

gunnre
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Joined: 2012-07-22
reading your mind

Awesome.... My wife and I had a nice little discussion of this last night. 31 yrs of marriage we have been 'reading each other's minds' a lot lately. Assuming we know each others thoughts, intentions, reactions. Truly errodes the peace of mind. Thank you. Seeing this over my morning coffee/quiet time must be my topic for prayer and change today :)

Anonymous
Big Book Study

This was read at the beginning of a Big Book Study:

Searching for Humility in a Big Book Study
401 AA Group – Saint Joseph, Missouri
April 4, 2013

We come together every Thursday at 5:30 for a Big Book Study. There is a reason we do this study. There are people who are called Big Book Thumpers. The term is often used in a derogatory manner, suggesting that the Big Book Thumper is a rigid person who only accepts their interpretation of the Big Book. Most of us know someone like that. Our purpose in this Big Book Study is to read a couple of pages from the Big Book and to collectively search for the wisdom. We are here to hear what others think. Our purpose is not to convince others that our interpretation is the only true interpretation – our purpose is to learn from others.

I ask myself, are we communicating and learning – or are we just taking turns talking. We have an opportunity to learn, to understand, to grow in the program of Alcoholics Anonymous. The authority of AA does not rest in the wisdom of a few old timers – the authority of AA rests in the Big Book. We hear people say, “I once heard an old-timer say…” as if that qualification makes the statement an absolute truth. We sometimes hear people say, “I have 20 years sober and I say…” as if their sober time affirms their wisdom. Sometimes we hear people say, “Well, I was always told…” as if having been told something makes it wise and true. People with many years of recovery possess their own unique wisdom – but the true wisdom is collective – it is the voice of many, not of one. The wisdom and authority of AA resides in the Big Book.

Each of us comes to this table with a bias. Each of us has a preconceived idea about what the central message of AA really is. That bias, or preconceived idea, is the wall that prevents more learning. We cannot learn and grow if we listen only for the words that affirm what we already know. The purpose of a Big Book Study is to put aside our own ideas and to listen closely to others.

Every time we read this book together something new is revealed – but only if we are open to listening and learning. We only learn from others when others share their insight into the reading. There is an old adage: When you know you know that is when you don’t know.” We have learned to laugh again, but AA is a serious program for serious people. None of us is here to show off our wisdom – we are here to remain humble as we search for the true wisdom of Alcoholics Anonymous.

Remember, God liked his first AA Meeting so much He has not missed one since.

Anonymous
Big Book Study.

Great sharing from you on this topic. I go to a Big Book Study here in Glasgow in Rose St. every Saturday morning at 10.00 am.

We go from page one until the end of a VISION FOR YOU. We study and share on one or two paragraphs at the time.

It is an excellent study group for me.

Good luck to you all.

Anonymous
bi book study

thank you. i am sober 42 years. i need to hear what you said--so i can learn to listen again and lose my big shotism.

Anonymous
Humility...

I heard that the English word HUMILITY is from the Latin word HUMUS, which means the GROUND!!!

Anonymous
RE Big Meeting

I believe that God is present at every meeting, He
sits at the head table. I don't have to point to Him and
say: That One is God! May you find Him NOW. Let God be God
and do His own work in His own way. He is worthy and capable. ANONYMOUS

Anonymous
RE RE Big Meeting

"I believe that God is present at every meeting"
why wouldn’t he be, if he is everything or nothing? He does not want to miss out on a laugh !!

Anonymous
BB at the 401

Good message beginning to end. Thanks. Been sober since my second meeting at the 401 in 1979. Sounds like good stuff going on there still. Think I'll tread across those parquet floors again soon.

Anonymous
RE: big book study

Bill W. was a gifted man. He was the author of the Big
Book. I consider the third edition of the Big Book the
second greatest story ever told. If Bill was given the
wisdom to write such a book, why do we ignore his other
books and writings? He wrote the Big Book at five years
sober. Collectively all of Bill's material offers us a
way to get sober and stay sober, and to transfer this
"way" to all alcoholics who need and want it. After
writing the Big Book, Bill spent the rest of his life
developing that "way". Half measures avail us nothing.
If we continue to ignore Bill's later writings and
warnings, we will kill the goose that laid the golden egg. Why focus entirely on the Big Book and
ignore the rest of the message? In future writings
Bill explains and simplifies many of his previous writings.
I continue to learn. Just this morning I read in concept XI
about the importance of electing qualified leaders. I
believe that too much of our fellowship/program has been
turned over to the white chippers. I do not fault the
newer members. We are all to blame for our failure.
I have heard that as long as there is doubt or a chance
of being wrong, I will always be conflicted. When I am
100 % certain that I know what I know to be correct, then
I can find peace. I have heard that it can also be a sign
of insanity. I write what I believe to be the truth, the
whole truth and nothing but the truth. ANONYMOUS

Anonymous
What I have read today

The name of the website, is: "AAGRAPEVINE: The International Journal of Alcoholics Anonymous." The title of this page from the website, is: "Heard in Meetings."
I got on the site today looking for some topic ideas to use in upcoming meetings. To my dismay, I found heated debates and arguments similar in format to what is seen on Facebook. I'm not angry, hurt or disgusted; I'm greatly disappointed and concerned. Did any of you accomplish anything? Mature and healthy discussions about opinions would be understandable, but destructive, selfish, judgmental, and finger pointing agendas are dangerous and ineffective.
What if I were a newcomer wanting to locate reading material or learn about the "Grapevine" and found these "discussions?"
For my initial search, I'm certain I will receive better information from my HP and from tonight's meeting.

Anonymous
AA Meeting Topic

Step One: Since I am powerless and my life has become unmanageable doesn't it make since that I need a manager with power? Suggestion: Read pagers 60-63 in AA "Big Book" from standpoint of "this is how I live my life without Alcohol and without the 12-Step program of recovery.

Anonymous
re: what I have read today

And our visitor's inventory taking is different, how?

Anonymous
Meeting protocol

At a meeting recently a non-member non-alcoholic stood up to make a statement at an open AA meeting. The moderator shared that only members are allowed to speak at our meetings but we were glad she was there and he would be happy to visit with her after the meeting. Some of the members booed him. I was appalled. It was my understanding that only members were allowed to speak at meetings: open or closed. Is there any written information on this?

Anonymous
Re:Meeting protocol

Our literature suggests that AA members should have an opportunity to speak before any non-members a provided time to speak. Each group (4th trad.) decides how they want to handle their meetings (2nd trad.)

AD010416
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Joined: 2012-01-18
Re: Meeting Protocol

What can a non-alcoholic know about staying sober? For years non-alcoholics told me all I had to do was quit drinking. They had no idea of the obsession, and the craving for more after the fist was totally beyond their understanding.
Bill W. got through to Dr. Bob because they both spoke the same language. That's what has made AA successful over the years--as an oldtimer often said, in AA we don't tell, we share.

Anonymous
re meeting protocal

Yes there is. The pamphlet "The AA Group" and traditions 2, 4, 12.

af72475
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Joined: 2013-03-22
my 1st aameeting out of rehab 3 years 4monthago

A old timer with 55 years came up to me after the meeting and says"I loveyou and god does fo. I sooneeded to hear that and stilli play that tapeback in my head during a bad day.

Anonymous
chips

I love old chips.My old friend and sponsor Jack had a bag full of them when he Passed away. His beautiful wife gave them to me and I have hung on to one to remember him, and given the rest to different meetings to pass out.I think Jack would have liked that. k.

Solutions
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Joined: 2011-06-07
Chips

Who would have thought that something as trivial as a length of sobriety chip, could cause so many resentments. Petty self absorbed posturing only distracts us from our primary purpose which may I remind you all is to carry the message to the alcoholic who still suffers.

Anonymous
Re-Chips

Also We're did chips come from?
Because it blows our: One day @ a time..

Anonymous
Where the chips came from

Sister Ignasious..at the Towns hospital..worked dilligently with alcoholics..I could be wrong about the hospital but it was with Dr.Bob...when an alcoholic was discharged,she gave them a coin to return to her if they felt the need to drink.
I have been sober for 1 year..2 months..personally I looked forward to getting a monthly chip..I was told it helps a newcomer see some HOPE..and others with more sobriety said it helps them to remember early sobriety..it helps to see who to have a hand out to.
the last few months..people knew me..they were happy for me.
I felt uncomfortable being the center of attention when I celebrated my 1st anniversary. I was told it is a celebration for AA.. It is a way to show gratitude for the fellowship

Anonymous
I struggle with the "great I am"

See "I AM not very much" but "I AM always on my mind"

Anonymous
I had to quit playing God.

I quit playing God by resigning my divinity and joining the human race!!!

Anonymous
The Door to AA swings both

The Door to AA swings both ways!!

Anonymous
you know

you know, it's not what you don't know that will kill you in AA. It's what you know for sure, that just isn't so!

AD010416
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Joined: 2012-01-18
Chips and Length of Sobriety

Many people don't like to see people celebrate lengths of sobriety simply because it reminds them that they never seem to acquire any length of sobriety.
For those who resent any observance of anniversaries:
Founders Day in Akron every June;
Bill W.'s annual birthday dinner held until he died;
This, from AA history Lovers "Original message from xxxxxxxxx
It was recently reported at the Old Timers Panel during the Kentucky State Convention that the years sobriety will be bumped to 50 to be selected to speak at the Atlanta AA International. Our delegate confirmed that it has been "board approved."

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